The Owner and Operator of Self

The Owner and Operator of Self

The process of enlightenment is a real process. It takes 3 days to balance out afterwards, it is formula, It is about going toward everything that feels bad about yourself and moving through it and realizing it is an illusion. That is why religions will not lead you to enlightenment. Because religions teach you to be good and in a sense run away from where enlightenment is. It is a major distraction just like you see in politics.

Enlightenment is a process of transcending the ego and the worlds of duality. When you pass through that barrier of illusion, you are more clear to know and recognize truth. The ego settles back in the body within 3 days and that is very scary because it feels bad and it can be interpreted as the person is bad, But the ego settles back in as merely a tool and no longer the owner and operator of the self.

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The Defense

I met life in a beaded gown
with edges that were frayed
It was my only armor
From power and it’s play

The garb was awkwardly comfortable
As I wore it just like skin
It was so familiar I didn’t know
Where it ended and I begin

As I was met with cruelty
I added beads and knots
It sheltered me from the pain
Hid the real me that I forgot

Then someone smiled sweetly
And wiped my brow of need
In that act of kindness
My dress dropped a single bead

This loosened up the fibers
Seams started splitting all apart
Then a miracle happened
The worn threads exposed my heart

I then received more kindness
The whole dress became unbound
lost were all defenses
All the beads dropped to the ground

When I watched them tumble
And was stripped of my attire
I realized hate, fear and dread
Are never more required

I stand here bare to the soul
With no other false enhancement
May others too drop their garbs
For the sake of Humanity’s advancement

Now I wear a beadless gown
With no hint of wear or fray
Soul is woven in pure light and sound
Love shines through to all this way.

Jen Ward 8/13/15


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Taps: Roll Up Your Sleeves

You know how to undo a real tangled knot? You focus on where all the strands converge in the thickest part of the knot and stick a pin in the middle of it. Then you wiggle the strands free one by one. If you work at the ends, it will be less effective. Every agenda is like a strand of twine. Where they converge in disagreement is where they tangle.
We can not sit by and wait for political leaders to step up and counter the negativity we see play out. It is up to individuals to roll up their sleeves and hold humanity accountable for their actions. It may feel like that is done by confrontation. But, no. That only fuels the dissension.
The way to address the hate and violence is to use your capabilities forged out of compassion and kindness, to heal those who are afflicted with systemic hate. These taps do just that. Please add your loving intention to dilute the concentrated hate we are seeing play out.

Want to know what SFT (Spiritual Freedom Technique) Taps Are? Click Here!

Say each statement out-loud three times while continuously tapping on the top of your head, and say it a fourth time while continuously tapping on your chest.

Don’t skip any because you don’t think they apply to you. The ones you want to skip are the ones you need to do.

“I declare myself a surrogate for the alt right in doing these taps; in all moments”
“I release feeling dejected; in all moments”
“I release the belief that I have been cheated out of what’s mine; in all moments”
“I release scapegoating others; in all moments”
“I release being used by the entitled to force an agenda; in all moments”
“I remove all blockages to truth; in all moments”
“I dissipate all psychic streams of energy that induce me to hate; in all moments”
“I release being whipped into a frenzy of hate; in all moments”
“I dissipate all psychic streams of energy of the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all engrams of the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all vortexes between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all programming and conditioning that the Nazi regime has put on me; in all moments”
“I release worshiping the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I send all energy matrixes of the Nazi regime into the Light and Sound; in all moments”
“I command all complex energy matrixes of the Nazi regime; be escorted into the Light and Sound; in all moments”
“I neutralize all the psychic energy built up in all symbolism; in all moments”
“I nullify all contracts between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I recant all vows and a agreements between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I release being at the mercy of the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all curses between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all blessings between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all tentacles between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I sever all strings and cords between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I strip all illusion off of the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I dissolve all karmic ties between myself and the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I remove all masks, walls and armor off the Nazi ; in all moments”
“I remove all the pain, burden and limitations that the Nazi regime has put on me; in all moments”
“I withdraw all my energy from the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I convert all hate to love; in all moments”
“I remove all the pain, burden, and limitations that I have put on all others due to the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I take back all that the Nazi regime has taken from me; in all moments”
“I give back to all others all that I have taken from them due to the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I eliminate the first cause in being associated with the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I collapse and dissolve all portals to the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I repair and fortify the Wei chi of all my bodies; in all moments”
“I shift my paradigm from the Nazi regime to the divinity of personal empowerment; in all moments”
“I am healed, whole and capable of discerning truth; in all moments”
“I transcend the Nazi regime; in moments”
“I collapse and dissolve the Nazi regime; in all moments”
“I am centered and empowered in divine love; in all moments”
“I resonate, emanate and am interconnected with all life in divine love; in all moments”
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The Reason Why

The Reason Why

14054194_10210133759929724_2585536495462384167_nWhen I was imprisoned for a year, people ask why I did not leave if I was not technically locked up. My captor was fluent in conspiracy theories. He studied all the different scenarios about space visitors and other planets. Through my intuitive abilities, I was tapped in to many things I never before privy to. Early on in our friendship; while I was still in my life, I facilitated remote sessions for him. In one of them, I sensed a blockage in his brain that I perceived as an implant. I was very new to energy work but somehow I knew how to dissolve that for him. In doing that, he felt very free and at peace. In me doing that It tuned me more and more into experiences and worlds that were so foreign to me but also made me feel more and more removed from my daily life.

His friendship with me made him more conscious of experiences that he wasn’t usually privy to as well. He had an aversion to people and felt they exuded a slime around him. When I talked to him on the phone, I could somehow dissipate the slime for him. He became dependent on me for that and there always seemed to be more implants to remove. For myself, I was flattered by the attention and feeling of importance. The relationship became more and more dysfunctional as I allowed friends and family to slip away to be on call for him when he needed my help; which was all the time. One night he called me very disturbed because he had the conscious experience of being a ruthless kingpin who microwaved a human being to death.

I was having more surreal experiences myself that isolated me more and more from all I knew. I had the conscious memory of me and him in his kingpin life being drugged by this alien race of female like creatures. They were very sultry and seductive. We called them the cat people. They took us to a very dark and lonely planet. From there we were operated on and our living tissue was fused with a metal frame and we were turned into human cyborgs. It is the loneliest experience one could encounter. After this, I was unable to speak clearly for a couple of weeks. I had developed an instant severe stutter that alarmed the one friend that I did not alienate. As odd and intense as these new memories were, they have been great research in helping my clients with deep-seated issues and fears. Some of these traumas come up for my clients.

This person who became my captor started out as wanting to help me. That is how I went to live with him. My one woman friend (who actually was key in me eventually escaping) asked me before I moved away with him if I was sure that I want to do it. I felt that I must. I told her that I was going away as  the Gray and coming back as Gandolf the White. I did not realize that I was exactly right. That the reason I had to go away; neither of which I realized until years after I was back: was twofold. It was to fulfill my requirements of being a Sangoma, and to achieve Enlightenment. The requirements of the Sangoma was to pull one’s self from the brink of death and to perform animal sacrifice. I fulfilled both requirements.

So the reason I did not leave the situation when I still had a chance was I believed I was doing healing work for the planet. He believed that the fat on my body represented the ills in the world; that I was a personification of earth. By me burning all the fat off my body, and being sensory deprived, that we were uplifting the planet. That is why I complied. At one point there were over ripe persimmons falling off the ground and I was starving to death (literally) and I would not eat any of them because I was devoted to the cause. My brain was starving, my body was starving and I became very simple in thought and action. It was good to have a container for water and my pillow sack to carry all my tools off to work in the woods every day. I was very grateful.

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Gratitude for Keeping Me Alive

Gratitude for Keeping Me Alive

Ten years ago in March, I was laying on a cold basement floor resolved to die of starvation. I would wake up before sunrise and wait for the captor to give me the command to get dressed to prepare and work outside until after sunset. I would frantically dress and await for him to drill me about my dreams. He was looking for any information he needed on what the next step was in my demise.

Little did either he or I know, my spirit guides were preparing me to have the strength to get myself out of there in two days. They would show me the apartment that I would live in one short month later and showed me the new people who I would meet in my new life. Most everyone that I had known before the captivity would not accept me back into their world. Only a couple special gems would embrace me after disappearing for a year.

The captor could not possible know that every night, I was taken to this seminar atmosphere that was set up for many visitors. It was a recurring dream that I had every night. I would be in a hotel setting that was prepared to receive a lot of guests at this special event. Sometimes I sat in the seats like everyone else. But sometimes I was in a back hall that I realize was in front of everyone.

In the first few months, there were only a few people who were sitting in the chairs. It comforted me that they were there. They seemed to make it easier to get through the waking days. A very few were people I knew then that have remained in my life. The rest I did not know who they were. But it comforted me to be with them. It was as if being with them in the dream state kept me nurtured from an otherwise socially deprived existence.

Being with them kept me alive. At the end of my captivity the group swelled to multitudes. Now I know who those people were. They were you. The people who kept me alive with their company are the people here who read my posts and support me in sharing my gifts. Since time and space are an illusion and all is happening at once, you are nurturing that starving, cold deprived version of me so I could get here to assist you in totally awakening.Marieland Bobby 015

The resort setting is the Hotel that I will be facilitation my first retreat at this May 12th and 13th. I recognized the Woodcliff Hotel from my dreams when we went to check out the facility. The date was also chosen for me from a dream I had twelve years ago. It is at the same time as the international Lilac Festival in my home town of Rochester, New York. The Ancient ones who Guide me have had an agenda for me all along. They were feeding me the details in my dreams.

The dreams during captivity were of my spirit guides showing me how many people I would help just by surviving and sharing my gifts. I needed all that encouragement to overcome the daily torture, brainwashing, starvation, harsh weather, sleep deprivation and sensory deprivation that I endured. Knowing on a subtle level, that I would know all of you and have your love and support, kept me alive.

In two short days ten years ago, I will have made the journey to my freedom. I was half dead and terrified but alive and excited as well. All kind of fears and curses from the captor were met to get away from that experiences. It was surreal and unimaginable at the time. But it was done and the gifts that I now access, took a long time to be drawn out of a terrified brainwashed emaciated stupor.

The date of my escape is the only special day that I celebrate. I am mostly alone since my reemergence into society and live like a monk. I spend my days writing, doing healing work for individuals and the world and tending the needs of my furry family inside and out. This year, I a celebrating by opening up more and more to assisting others than I could not have possibly fathomed even knowing; except of course in my dreams. But on my anniversary this year, I will be

As a celebration of the anniversary of me surviving, I will be doing a book signing at the Barnes and Nobles in the Pittsford Plaza in my home town. Enlightenment Unveiled and Emerging from te Mist are the two books I will be signing. thanks to Thérèse and Mike Kravetz, I ave seven books to offer te world so far and more to come. All my books hold the intention of empowering each reader.

As a way to reach more and more of the community that has kept me alive, more and more venues have been created to connect with you. in allowing me to assist as many souls as I can in the world. Since I have returned, many people have experienced energetic shifts in themselves that have experienced great transformations. My goal is that everyone survive whatever limitations that may hinder them in any way. May they access their gifts and talents as a way to outflow their incredible love into the world

One of the side affects of surviving being starved and tortured nearly to death is the ease in which I am able to love. This love pours out into everything I write and you are all benefactors of that great resource now.Another way to connect deeper to those I love is the multiple group sessions that I facilitate weekly. They are accessible to those who really want to realize their own omnipotence in the world.

These are a couple of the ways you have access to me and my love and gratitude and specially honed gifts. I am fearless in speaking truth and empowering others because I went through the process of enlightenment and know that I was kept alive to do exactly what I do. I am grateful to have such purpose and am completely immersed in sharing all my gifts so that you can uncover all of yours.

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