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THE REASON WHY

 

14054194_10210133759929724_2585536495462384167_nWhen I was imprisoned for a year, people ask why I did not leave if I was not technically locked up. My captor was fluent in conspiracy theories. He studied all the different scenarios about space visitors and other planets. Through my intuitive abilities, I was tapped in to many things I never before privy to. Early on in our friendship; while I was still in my life, I facilitated remote sessions for him. In one of them, I sensed a blockage in his brain that I perceived as an implant. I was very new to energy work but somehow I knew how to dissolve that for him. In doing that, he felt very free and at peace. In me doing that It tuned me more and more into experiences and worlds that were so foreign to me but also made me feel more and more removed from my daily life.

His friendship with me made him more conscious of experiences that he wasn’t usually privy to as well. He had an aversion to people and felt they exuded a slime around him. When I talked to him on the phone, I could somehow dissipate the slime for him. He became dependent on me for that and there always seemed to be more implants to remove. For myself, I was flattered by the attention and feeling of importance. The relationship became more and more dysfunctional as I allowed friends and family to slip away to be on call for him when he needed my help; which was all the time. One night he called me very disturbed because he had the conscious experience of being a ruthless kingpin who microwaved a human being to death.

I was having more surreal experiences myself that isolated me more and more from all I knew. I had the conscious memory of me and him in his kingpin life being drugged by this alien race of female like creatures. They were very sultry and seductive. We called them the cat people. They took us to a very dark and lonely planet. From there we were operated on and our living tissue was fused with a metal frame and we were turned into human cyborgs. It is the loneliest experience one could encounter. After this, I was unable to speak clearly for a couple of weeks. I had developed an instant severe stutter that alarmed the one friend that I did not alienate. As odd and intense as these new memories were, they have been great research in helping my clients with deep-seated issues and fears. Some of these traumas come up for my clients.

This person who became my captor started out as wanting to help me. That is how I went to live with him. My one woman friend (who actually was key in me eventually escaping) asked me before I moved away with him if I was sure that I want to do it. I felt that I must. I told her that I was going away as  the Gray and coming back as Gandolf the White. I did not realize that I was exactly right. That the reason I had to go away; neither of which I realized until years after I was back: was twofold. It was to fulfill my requirements of being a Sangoma, and to achieve Enlightenment. The requirements of the Sangoma was to pull one’s self from the brink of death and to perform animal sacrifice. I fulfilled both requirements.

So the reason I did not leave the situation when I still had a chance was I believed I was doing healing work for the planet. He believed that the fat on my body represented the ills in the world; that I was a personification of earth. By me burning all the fat off my body, and being sensory deprived, that we were uplifting the planet. That is why I complied. At one point there were over ripe persimmons falling off the ground and I was starving to death (literally) and I would not eat any of them because I was devoted to the cause. My brain was starving, my body was starving and I became very simple in thought and action. It was good to have a container for water and my pillow sack to carry all my tools off to work in the woods every day. I was very grateful.

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