Listening to people’s problems and dis-satisfactions is very difficult for me. It is excruciating and takes a lot of self-control to sit still for them. For me it is reliving them right in that moment. I don’t know why people want to make others live their pain with them unless they don’t understand that is what they are doing. When I help someone, l don’t dwell on their experiences. Being privy to their emotions and interactions is like rummaging in their underwear drawer to me. I perceive energy so I am more apt to just take the whole dresser drawer out and empty it with them. It is much more efficient and creates less wear and tear on the emotional and mental body. When people are having a hard time and spilling out their issues to anyone who will listen, it is obvious they are not centered. It is as easy to notice as physically seeing someone’s slip showing from under their skirt. You don’t help them by pulling the slip out, you help them but helping them adjust the slip back under their skirt. The way that I do this is by giving no energy to the complaints. Pretend that you haven’t […]
When someone asks you a question starting with, “How would you feel if….?”…don’t fall for it. It is a manipulative tactic to draw you into their issue by making it personal. They are trying to penetrate your energetic borders and make you susceptible to their cause. Don’t fall for it. They can deny it all they want or be ignorant to their motive, but this is what they are doing. Most likely, they will try to keep you engaged as a means of using your energy to feed the interaction. Refuse. Simply refuse to answer and politely withdraw all your attention from them. It is the way to maintain your objective without exhausting your resources.
There are those who want to remind us how horrific the world is right now. They want to cut through our joy. They consciously believe they are being noble but don’t realize that it is a form of manipulation. If they can weaken our happiness, then they feel important. They see those of us who choose happiness as strong. They want to gauge their own strength by being able to influence us. The next time someone tries to move you from your joy with a reality check, just smile and stay centered. Joy is the ultimate state. You assist the world more by exuding Joy rather than coming into agreement with its opposite. Being a focal point for peace, contentment and happiness, is a great way to uplift the world.
When someone puts their problems “out there”, they are looking for some unforeseen force to save them. They are limiting their own effectiveness by putting themselves at a lower vantage point than the unforeseen “saver” or savior. They are debasing themselves. The sympathetic are at a higher vantage point than those that are receiving sympathy. So the mere act of sharing issues is lowering one’s stance. If I sympathize with someone with problems, it is a form of agreement with their plight. In a way, it is solidifying their diminutive stance instead of absolving it.
Many people are pack animals. They want to feel included when they are in a group. They want to be validated as part of the herd. Unfortunately some may revert to the lowest common denominator in groups to ensure that they belong. The lowest commonality is complaints and problems. Everyone seems to be able to relate to them so it is a common ground of discussion and by having problems and complaints, one can be reassured that they will fit in. The better way is to raise the bar for the whole group. Be so assured in yourself and committed to Joy and Kindness that they become common ground for the group. By refusing to engage in the opposite with confidence, you will be inviting others to do the same. Eventually, the problems and complaints mentality will no longer serve a social purpose and will dry up. Here are some EFT taps to assist you: (Say each statement three times while tapping on your head, and say it a fourth time while tapping on your chest.) I release using complaints and problems as social crutch, in all lifetimes. I release attracting problems by identifying with others’ issues, in all lifetimes. […]